Consider this a warning from the Poison Ivy Awareness Association of America

Remember that famous (or infamous, depending on your political leanings) Shepherd Fairey  Obama hope poster? For some reason, I got the itch to find out how to duplicate that look on my own. Sure, there are websites where you can upload a photo and have your face Obama-hope-posterized — “hopesterized” — but where’s the fun in that?

Fairey created his original using screen printing techniques, but with this handy tutorial as a starting point, Photoshop and Illustrator save you the stencil and acrylic work.

A sad portrait of a friend who was attacked in the face by poison ivy served as my guinea pig for my first “hopesterize” attempt. My technique’s not yet worthy for a spot in the Smithsonian next to Fairey’s original.

But, it’s still a pretty convincing warning about the dangers of poisonous foliage.

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Mild or Wild? Click to help BP spin the Wild-O-Meter...

BP puts the “slick” in oil slick. They’ve positioned themselves to raise oil prices, tie the hands of the government, and still have a chance to save their oil well for future use.

Did BP purposefully blow up their own offshore oil platform? Of course not. Are they still trying to turn disaster into dollars? Absolutely.

Now that the “top kill” method has failed, BP has been presented with a best case senario from their point of view. Rather than being forever frozen in a layer of concrete, the well-that won’t-die is still open for future business. According to the Washington Post, John Tesvich, head of the Mississippi State Oyster Task Force, wasn’t surprised the top kill tactic didn’t work:

For them to say that its success ratio was 60 to 70 percent, for a company that’s trying to spin everything as positive as it can, that probably means they knew it wasn’t likely to have an effect. And that’s what’s being borne out now. It now looks likely that this will be an ordeal — that the oil will be spewing most of the summer.

The people on the ground in Mississippi aren’t surprised, neither should we be.

How BP spells “relief”: Ka-ching

The only way to stop the spill? Drill a “relief well.” Poor BP. They’ll have to sink another well into the Gulf. Considering the drilling ban recently enacted by President Obama, BP must devastated with the prospect of another chance to tap into the Gulf’s oil reserves. The net result will be not one but two BP wells pumping side-by-side off the coast of Louisiana by the time this ordeal is over.

And a summer-long oil leak will be all that’s required to send oil and gasoline prices on an extended spike while BP and the rest of the oil industry cash in on the profits. This despite the fact that, as huge as this spill is, it represents a tiny fraction of the 81 million barrels of oil produced globally each year according to BP’s own 2009 statistical review.

(On a side note, here’s the pdf of BP’s global oil production chart for 2009 and here’s a pdf of BP’s powerpoint presentation on world energy statistics presented at the USAEE.)

Obama’s over a barrel

Meanwhile, Obama’s over a barrel. The American people want accountability for the disaster, but the government has neither the technical expertise to address the spill on their own nor the ability to threaten the powerful oil industry with economic ultimatums.

President Obama is not known as a man of action by either party. Teddy Roosevelt spoken softly and carried a big stick; President Obama prefers to speak sternly and carry a selection of tasty candy. But as his recent press conference on the fiasco demonstrated, Obama isn’t even speaking sternly this time.

Where are the massive fines for every day BP does not stop that well? You can’t tell me that if BP had to scratch a $2 million check for every day this spill goes on their team of scientists wouldn’t be a little more motivated. Interactive oil spill timeline here.

Somehow, BP has reduced the President of the United States to a sequence of “concerned thoughts” and “I-don’t-know-what-any-of-my-departments-are-doings.” All President Obama can do is sit in the Oval Office and watch the live video feed of oil bubbling up from the floor of the Gulf like the rest of us.

Now that’s slick, BP.

BP: Mild or Wild?

So where does all this put BP on the Wild-O-Meter? Well, you have to look at this from two sides.

On the Evil side, there’s the fudging numbers, greasing palms, half-hearted containment efforts, the ruining of fishermen’s livelihood, and the endangerment of miles of beautiful American coastline. That’s pretty evil. Evil generally gets a very low Wild-O-Meter reading.

But there’s also the Genius side. BP is turning disaster into dollars, putting slick moves on Obama and the Feds, and setting themselves up for expanding their business in the Gulf. And no one can stop them. Strategically, that’s just brilliant.

Evil+Genius = Evil Genius. That’s why the Wild-O-Meter gives BP’s handling of the oil mess in the Gulf….  2.5 roaring kittens out of five.

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As a sign of his obvious anger and disgust, Obama has ignored my multiple facebook friend requests. Apparently my message, “Yes, we can be friends” has been met with an emphatic “No, we can’t.”

According to a CBS News report, President Obama has decided on a “new strategy” in Afghanistan, planning to “send a lot more troops…and keep them there long term.” Coincidentally, his strategy sounds sounds similar to Gen. Stanley McChrystal’s request for 40,000 new combat troops in Afghanistan. 


The US will deploy a total of 100,000 troops to sunny Central Asia by the end of next year.


No doubt, the President is anticipating backlash from voters and political entities across the spectrum. Democrats will accuse him of following in the footsteps of George Bush II. Republicans will accuse him of following in the footsteps of George Bush II. George Bush II will accuse Obama of making fun of his idea, then stealing his idea and not giving him any credit for it. 


King Solomon will likely use the opportunity to promote his new book, “Ecclesiastes,” citing his work on “there’s nothing new under the sun” and “everything is meaningless, a chasing after the wind” as especially relevant to the discussion.


Obama could see all that coming. But there’s one startling source of critique that has blindsided him like a freight train at full-speed loaded with the lead of truth — my facebook page.

Exactly two weeks ago, I posted this prediction about the outcome of his “long and careful deliberation” about the deployment of more troops to Afghanistan (Props to Kelly for the election timing nuance.):

Obama was so shocked and angered that I, a seasoned political analyst, could see where his “new strategy” was headed two weeks before it was announced that he refused to comment on my status update.

As a sign of his obvious anger and disgust, Obama has ignored my multiple facebook friend requests. Apparently my message, “Yes, we can be friends” has been met with an emphatic “No, we can’t.” 


It seems that the White House has been ordered to not follow my twitter feed.

Don’t worry, America. This freight train of truth will keep rolling. Being shunned by our Commander in Chief is a price I’m willing to pay for my insightful  140 character political commentaries.

We crave hope like bugs crave porch lights.

Barack Obama’s book title, The Audacity of Hope, and the favorable response by many Americans to this book — and his entire campaign for that matter — illustrate the human being’s magnetic attraction to anything resembling hope.  While the hope many speak of is synonymous with a loosely defined “dream” (as in “American Dream”, rags to riches, etc.) for a better future, the true nature of hope is more concrete, more demanding, and more powerful.

We Christians are to blame for the confusion. The church does a wonderful job of telling our culture where it is going wrong.  Not even so much how it is going wrong – as in, an explanation of the defect in terms that define it and propose correction – just specific instances of wrong, like a referee blowing the whistle when the ball goes out of bounds.  Appraisal of this kind is one function of the Christian faith in a individual and in society at large. However, Christ did not come merely to point out the flaws of fallen humanity.  That was only half his mission. 

For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. (John 3:17)

Christ did much more than merely highlight the shortcomings of sinners.  Christ offered what every longing heart craves. A rescue.  Redemption.  If we are to address our world as Christ did, then we must not neglect to offer hope.

The hope we offer is only as good as the hope we ourselves enjoy.  Why is the Church not offering hope to people in our culture? One reason is because individuals in the church are living without hope themselves.  Upward mobility / “Be all you can be” is such an ingrained value to our American society that this vague American Dream has replaced the robust notion of hope that our faith espouses. When we speak of God giving us hope or of having hope we seem to be thinking more of a Barack Obama-type “If God were president (or king, or “lord” or whatever), then he might make things better for me” dream.  Or the “If I just have faith, things will work out in the end” idea.

May I suggest that we don’t have dreams, we practice hope. Hope is not something we have. Hope is something we do.

For God is not unjust so as to forget your work and the love which you have shown toward His name, in having ministered and in still ministering to the saints. And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence so as to realize the full assurance of hope until the end, so that you will not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises. (Hebrews 6:10-12)

An old commentator of yesteryear puts it this way: 

Hope is…made up of an earnest desire for an object, and a corresponding expectation of obtaining it. The hope of heaven is made up of an earnest wish to reach heaven, and a corresponding expectation of it…The full assurance of that hope exists where there is the highest desire of heaven, and such corresponding evidence of personal piety, as to leave no doubt that it will be ours. (Barnes NT Commentaries)

People are drawn to hope like bugs to a porch light. So while some are huddled in their homes peeking out their curtains at the scary shadows they see scurrying around in our dark world, let’s you and me flip the switch, and let the light shine.

Hope starts with us.

A page from my blog: http://owildman.blogspot.com