Sarah woke today from dozing in a pain-pill induced haze and called for me to come over.

“What, Sweetheart?” I asked, “Do you need more water?”
“No, I need a hug. I just had a terrible dream.“
“Oh no, what was it about?”
“It was really bad.”
“It’s ok. You can tell me.”
“Well,” she started, “I had a dream that I was shopping.”
“That sounds good. Girls love shopping.”
“No, I had a dream that I was shopping and Beth Chapman from Dog the Bounty Hunter had her own clothing store.”
“You’re right,” I said. “That’s a terrible dream.”
“The worst part was that Beth Chapman had her own store and she was forcing me to buy clothes and try them on. It was a really bad dream.”

The moral of the story: If you think all the crowds are bad while you’re doing your Christmas shopping this month, remember, it could be much worse. You could be trapped in a store owned by this woman, and forced to try on clothes. Fashions by Beth: A fate worse than death.